As today is the feast day of St Virgil the Geometer it must mean the feast day of St Finnegan and his infamous elbow must be edging ever closer. Like St Finnegan, Virgil was an Irish monk who became famous for teaching that the earth is a sphere. Unlike St Finnegan, Virgil only has only one feast day (a year). Such is the nature of St Finnegan’s beardy heroics his feast is celebrated every day (except Sundays and Very holy days – like Christmas, that would just be confusing) . Starting on December 3rd the festivities continue right through until January 31st
As is traditional St Finnegan’s holy day is celebrated by a veneration of the holy elbow. If you’ve never seen the like, this might give you an idea. This occurred last weekend, when thousands of Catholic pilgrims descended on the Indian coastal state of Goa to witness the once-a-decade exposition of the sacred relics of St Francis Xavier.
Mind the St Finnegan exposition is considerably more esoteric – there is photographic evidence of preparations below!
The exposition happens at a private girls school which seems to have borrowed its teaching methods from St Trinians, Mallory Towers and Hogwarts. Recent Ofsted inspectors have been rather underwhelmed, rating it the worst school in Suffolk (and Peterborough – depending on the time of year). The Reverand Mother however is unperturbed ‘we are guided by God’ she told one reporter ‘not an earthling from the Bullingdon club. We keep on raising the bar and our students , bless ’em, keep finding ways to duck under, over or round it.’.
The daily veneration of the elbow is a ticketed event, with all funds going to the Nuns heated swimming pool appeal. Tickets and further information here – or by calling the school admission office (which is often found pretending to be Eastern Angles box office) on 014473211498